When I blogged the other day about my son being the other
side of the world and how much I was missing him, I was quickly reminded that I had not
told you the full story.
You see, I did have another son but he was “born asleep”. It’s not that I had forgotten about him as he’s
with me constantly, but I've always tended to keep our closeness to myself.
Dealing with my separation from Adam was extremely hard to
cope with. I didn’t understand why it
had to be that way. I thought I had lost
my child forever.
I now know that's not so. Ok so I couldn’t hold him, comfort him, raise
him, etc, but I do still feel his closeness and I now know that he is not lost
to me.
He had a purpose when he was with me for those months that I
carried him. I didn’t know that at the
time, but I do now. I don’t know what his purpose was, but maybe I will one day. I'm told that these babies who come but never touch the earth are really special, they are free spirits, but I need to do a little more investigating on that one. What I do know is that I haven’t lost him, we are separated in this
lifetime but not for ever. My love for
him will never die and we will be together at some point.
My second son is still with me, albeit on the other side of
the world, but I don’t have to wait so long for us to be together again. I will see him, talk to him and hug him again
in this lifetime. He, too, had a purpose
for coming to me, although again I’m not sure what it is. Maybe it’s to help me to deal with separation
which, over the past few days, I have been working on.
I have given birth to two sons in this lifetime. Both of them I love to pieces, but both of
them are physically away from me. So I’m dealing
with it.
Very touching, your post.
ReplyDeleteI can relate to the feeling of separation from my child. I experienced separation from my first daughter, because she chose to live with her dad, who then brainwashed her against me and my family. I had close to no contact for seven years, apart from in my heart. We are now 're-united', but nobody will bring back those years I've missed her growing up and developing. I know why she came to me, and I am most grateful that she has chosen so. She's a wonderful human being and an old soul - a real gift to the world. She still lives in Germany, so we're still separated, but it's fine.
My second daughter, who is and has been very close to me, wants to go to Australia this year. Another separation to deal with ......